Affirmation: Gay & Lesbian Mormons

Are We As Proud of our Mormon Culture as We Are of Our Gay Identities?

June, 1995
By Sue

The marquee above the theater entrance read: WELCOME AFFIRMATION! GAY AND LESBIAN MORMONS. Two women, both members of Affirmation, looked up at the sign which proclaimed to the world who they are and why they were in Santa Cruz, CA. A couple passing by, laughingly remarked, "Who would want to be gay?" Her companion replied, "Who would want to be Mormon?!"

For most of you reading this publication, however, the fact remains–we are gay, lesbian or bisexual and Mormon. As we approach the summer and Gay Pride celebrations across the country, I wonder how many of us are equally as proud of our Mormon culture and heritage as we are of our gay identities?

It is certainly my view, as well as that of many prominent scientists, researchers, and psychologists that sexual orientation is not a matter of choice. Not surprisingly, however, there has never been a consensus among Mormon theologians as to when we acquire our individual premortal characteristics. The Prophet Joseph Smith stated: "the Spirit of man is not a created being; it existed from the eternities" (Andrew F. Ehat, The Words of Joseph Smith, Lyndon Cook, eds., 1980, 60). The debate continues as to whether or not our spirits are and were created to be gay straight or bisexual–before the world was created. The answers to these questions will most likely remain unanswered during this life. I often feel that I misuse valuable time pondering the "whys" of my situation.

Time would be more wisely spent using my free agency to act upon my special gifts, talents, and sensibilities which God has given me–to all of us–because we are gay, lesbian, and bisexual. All aspects of our beings are, and will continue to be, part of our unique premortal character. I believe all of our premortal characteristics are equally precious to our Heavenly Father including our sexual orientation–and we are deserving of the pride we feel in our gay culture.

Do we feel the same pride in our Mormon heritage? Or is being gay and Mormon the oxymoron that the majority of the world believes? As a convert to the church, and the first Mormon in my extended family, I often felt that I didn't have a claim to the pioneer history of the many multigenerational LDS families that I knew. Many friends and acquaintances in Affirmation, born and raised in the church, no longer feel the pride of affiliation with an organization which condemns homosexuality. I respect and understand those feelings, I also believe, that we have been given a unique opportunity to be latter-day pioneers for all of our gay, lesbian, bisexual brothers and sisters who will follow us. We can be proud of who we are only if we come out of the "church closet" and identify ourselves. We are taking a risk, to be sure, but the rewards may be a stronger pride in who we are as individuals in the gay community and a greater appreciation of our LDS heritage as well.

However you choose to celebrate this summer, I hope you will take pride in who you were, who you are now and all you have yet to become.