{"id":18293,"date":"2018-03-05T17:57:29","date_gmt":"2018-03-06T00:57:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/affirmation.org\/encouragement-to-extend-the-invitation\/"},"modified":"2021-10-03T12:00:12","modified_gmt":"2021-10-03T18:00:12","slug":"encouragement-to-extend-the-invitation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/affirmation.org\/pt\/incentivo-para-estender-o-convite\/","title":{"rendered":"Incentivo para estender o convite"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Foto<\/em><\/p>\n

Jordan, um jovem noivo de seu futuro marido, pediu conselhos no Grupo do Facebook Affirmation Community Conversations<\/a> sobre como deve lidar com o convite \u00e0 fam\u00edlia e aos amigos que expressaram seu desconforto com a ideia de comparecer ao casamento. Houve muitas respostas excelentes oferecendo conselhos e perspectivas. Quer\u00edamos compartilhar o que Jacob Newman tinha a dizer.<\/em><\/p>\n

Por Jacob Newman<\/strong><\/p>\n

Antes de mais nada, parab\u00e9ns! Voc\u00ea e seu futuro marido merecem uma vida inteira de felicidade. Esta \u00e9 uma pergunta realmente excelente (e oportuna, considerando o hist\u00f3rico da lideran\u00e7a da Igreja em quest\u00f5es LGBTQIA +) e com a qual posso me identificar desde que me casei em agosto de 2016.<\/p>\n

Casar-se com um homem foi dif\u00edcil para minha fam\u00edlia, mas eles foram \u00f3timos. Convidei todos os meus irm\u00e3os e at\u00e9 alguns parentes. Dito isso, fui seletivo sobre quem convidei. N\u00e3o senti a necessidade de convidar pessoas (especialmente alguns de minha fam\u00edlia extensa) de quem n\u00e3o me sentia particularmente pr\u00f3ximo ou pessoas que eu achava que n\u00e3o seriam favor\u00e1veis \/ felizes naquele dia. Meus pais ainda estavam um pouco em d\u00favida sobre as coisas, eu acho, mas eles estavam dispostos a vir para me apoiar e agora eles amam muito meu marido.<\/p>\n

Se eu n\u00e3o tivesse convidado as pessoas que amo para o casamento (ou se eles tivessem feito a escolha de n\u00e3o comparecer), eles teriam se arrependido. Mas pelo menos estendi o convite. Acho que se eles rejeitarem seu convite, voc\u00ea n\u00e3o se arrepender\u00e1 de convid\u00e1-los, mas eles podem se arrepender de n\u00e3o terem vindo. E eles diriam a voc\u00ea no futuro que se arrependeram de n\u00e3o terem vindo. Minha sugest\u00e3o \u00e9 estender seu amor e bondade \u00e0queles que rejeitarem seu convite. A empatia pode ajudar muito na mudan\u00e7a de cora\u00e7\u00f5es. Quando eles s\u00e3o condicionados a acreditar que o casamento do mesmo sexo \u00e9 um ato de apostasia, \u00e9 dif\u00edcil para eles imaginarem assistir a um evento que pode ser visto como endossando a apostasia. Mas se voc\u00ea mostrar o verdadeiro amor de Cristo, seus cora\u00e7\u00f5es podem mudar, mesmo que eles n\u00e3o compare\u00e7am ao evento em si. Quando eles rejeitarem seu convite, sugiro apenas dizer que eles s\u00e3o bem-vindos, n\u00e3o importa o que aconte\u00e7a e que voc\u00ea respeita a decis\u00e3o deles.<\/p>\n

Antes de compartilhar minha pr\u00f3pria experi\u00eancia, quero que voc\u00ea saiba que a dor da rejei\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e9 muito real. Senti isso in\u00fameras vezes em minha jornada gay de ex-m\u00f3rmon! Eu tamb\u00e9m quero que voc\u00ea perceba que n\u00e3o importa como voc\u00ea decida reagir, est\u00e1 tudo bem. Meu conselho n\u00e3o \u00e9 a verdade do evangelho, mas acho que oferece uma perspectiva interessante.<\/p>\n

Uma das minhas melhores descobertas sobre a rejei\u00e7\u00e3o veio quando eu tive um primo que atacou meu casamento no Facebook. Doeu. Muito mal. A fam\u00edlia dela \u00e9 bastante homof\u00f3bica e terr\u00edvel para a comunidade LGBTQIA + em geral. Fiquei surpreso com as pessoas que sa\u00edram da toca para me defender: companheiros de miss\u00e3o, amigos TBM, etc. Decidi depois daquele ataque que tinha a op\u00e7\u00e3o de fa\u00e7o. Eu tinha que decidir como iria reagir aos seus ataques \/ rejei\u00e7\u00f5es pessoais. No final, quem vai doer mais com sua rejei\u00e7\u00e3o de mim s\u00e3o eles. Esta prima tem que conviver com as coisas horr\u00edveis que ela me disse. Estendi a m\u00e3o para ela e disse-lhe como me sentia e recomendei que ela leia um livro de Carol Lynn Pearson sobre a aceita\u00e7\u00e3o de nossos entes queridos gays<\/a>. Ela nunca respondeu, embora tenha visto a mensagem. Tirei amizade com toda a fam\u00edlia no Facebook e n\u00e3o me envolvo com eles pessoalmente porque eles me trataram mal. Tenho a decis\u00e3o de reagir como quero e mostrar o tipo de pessoa que quero ser com essas pessoas. Recusar-se a se envolver \u00e9 um ato de autocuidado.<\/p>\n

Portanto, meu conselho \u00e9 estender o convite, ser gentil se eles rejeitarem seu convite, entender que, se eles t\u00eam um hist\u00f3rico de trat\u00e1-lo bem, sua decis\u00e3o de n\u00e3o comparecer n\u00e3o \u00e9 um ataque pessoal, e de aproveitar seu dia especial! Aqueles que s\u00e3o capazes de ver al\u00e9m de suas cren\u00e7as religiosas para comparecer ao seu dia especial tamb\u00e9m merecem uma gentileza especial. As coisas raramente s\u00e3o em preto e branco e aqueles que s\u00e3o capazes de ver os tons de cinza e am\u00e1-lo por voc\u00ea s\u00e3o amigos de verdade!<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Casar-se com um homem foi dif\u00edcil para minha fam\u00edlia, mas eles foram \u00f3timos. Convidei todos os meus irm\u00e3os e at\u00e9 alguns parentes. Dito isso, fui seletivo sobre quem convidei. N\u00e3o senti necessidade de convidar pessoas de quem n\u00e3o me sentia particularmente pr\u00f3ximo ou pessoas que n\u00e3o me apoiariam ou n\u00e3o seriam felizes naquele dia. Meus pais ainda estavam um pouco em d\u00favida sobre as coisas, eu acho, mas eles estavam dispostos a vir para me apoiar e agora eles amam muito meu marido.\u00a0<\/p>","protected":false},"author":67,"featured_media":18289,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_piecal_is_recurring":false,"_piecal_recurring_interval":1,"_piecal_recurring_frequency":"","_piecal_recurring_exact_position":false,"_piecal_recurring_end":"","_piecal_color":"","_piecal_text_color":"","_piecal_global_color_master":false,"_piecal_rsets":"[]","_piecal_is_event":false,"_piecal_start_date":"","_piecal_end_date":"","_piecal_is_allday":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1849],"tags":[473,93,29,21,16,675,1303,142,353,214,267,107,45,17,27],"newsletters":[],"class_list":["post-18293","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","tag-adversity","tag-affirmation","tag-allies","tag-community","tag-family","tag-family-support","tag-family-support-2","tag-friends","tag-gay-marriage","tag-homosexuality","tag-lds-lgbt","tag-lgbt-mormons","tag-love","tag-marriage","tag-support"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nEncouragement to Extend the Invitation<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/affirmation.org\/pt\/incentivo-para-estender-o-convite\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"pt_BR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Encouragement to Extend the Invitation\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Getting married to a man was hard for my family, but they were really great. 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