{"id":8673,"date":"2016-01-28T12:32:41","date_gmt":"2016-01-28T20:32:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/affirmation.org\/?p=8673"},"modified":"2017-12-13T11:29:28","modified_gmt":"2017-12-13T19:29:28","slug":"lgbt-mormons-and-families-talk-about-the-new-lds-policy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/affirmation.org\/pt\/lgbt-mormons-and-family-talk-about-the-new-lds-policy\/","title":{"rendered":"M\u00f3rmons e fam\u00edlias LGBT falam sobre a nova pol\u00edtica SUD"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>By John Gustav-Wrathall<\/p>\n<p>At the recent Los Angeles Conference for LGBT Mormons, their Families and Friends, a workshop was conducted exploring participants&#8217; relationships with the LDS Church, specifically in light of the new policy released in early November 2015. I facilitated the workshop along with Laura Skaggs Dulin and Ron and Sue Raynes. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=w_RvYY4vsb4\" target=\"_blank\">Recordings of all three sessions of the workshop are available on Affirmation&#8217;s YouTube channel.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>The workshop was attended by roughly half of the 150 or so conference participants.\u00a0Participants were LGBT and straight, active members of the Church and ex-members and individuals questioning whether to leave or stay. Each was invited to share three words that summarized their feelings in reaction to the new policy on same-sex couples and their children. Participants were given the option of passing if they did not want to share. Half (50%) of the participants shared words conveying mostly\u00a0negative emotions (like shocked, betrayed, rejected, angry, scared, sad, disillusioned, confused, resigned). Eleven percent (11%) shared words conveying mostly\u00a0positive emotions (like listening, peace, hope, love, confident). Thirty-nine percent (39%) shared words that expressed a mix of both positive and negative emotions. The most commonly expressed negative emotion was \u201cconfused.\u201d The most commonly expressed positive emotion was \u201chopeful.\u201d (See Appendix, below.)<\/p>\n<p>After feelings had been shared, participants were invited to discuss their feelings or ask each other questions in greater depth. A gay man in his seventies told his story, of how after the death of his wife, he had found a same sex partner, and the two of them had raised their children in the Church and continued to believe the Gospel and attend regularly despite being excommunicated. After the policy came out, he stopped going to church, and found himself distancing himself from his children for fear that they might be penalized for associating with an \u201capostate.\u201d A number of individuals stated that they had stopped attending Church or were wrestling. One individual told how he had been released from his callings in his ward because he had expressed opposition to the policy. A straight woman worried that continuing to attend church would be interpreted by her LGBT friends as rejection. LGBT participants in the room urged her to keep going to church and find other, more positive ways to express support for LGBT people. Those who had expressed feelings of hope were asked why, and they cited reasons such as that they believed the policy was spurring a lot of discussion and they had seen Church members reaching out to LGBT individuals in love. Some LGBT individuals told how, even though individual church members were very loving, that their sense that the Church rejected them and that the Church\u2019s theology had no place for them weighed more heavily.<\/p>\n<p>Participants reported that the conference was a great source of emotional and social support in a time when many individuals within the community of LGBT Mormons, their families and friends have been experiencing extreme stress. One parent of a gay 16-year-old wrote of the conference:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>[Our son] was deeply impacted by Elder Nelson&#8217;s talk, texting me saying, &#8220;I hurt so bad I can&#8217;t breath and it scares me to fall asleep &#8230; What do I do? I just want to leave this place and leave my life, just for a little bit.&#8221;&#8230; But then he asked if we could attend the Affirmation conference.\u2026 Anyone questioning the LGBT community, or anyone &#8220;struggling&#8221; with a loved one who is LGBT, simply needs to attend one of Affirmation&#8217;s conferences. It will change their perspective, heart and likely life forever&#8230;. And for [our son]? A miracle indeed. He went from a place of confusion and torment to a place of peace, understanding and pure Christ-like love&#8230;. I am so blessed that our Heavenly Father sent [our son] to me and am now deeply grateful that [he] is indeed a &#8220;Gay Mormon&#8221; who is one of the most pure disciples of Christ to have ever walked this planet (I know &#8230; I am a very &#8220;proud dad&#8221; but those words are true).<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>____________________<\/p>\n<p>APPENDIX<\/p>\n<p>ANALYSIS OF POLICY REACTIONS<\/p>\n<p><u>VICTIMIZATION (total 17)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>abused<\/p>\n<p>attacked<\/p>\n<p>betrayed (5)<\/p>\n<p>broken<\/p>\n<p>demonized<\/p>\n<p>hurt (4)<\/p>\n<p>kicked<\/p>\n<p>pain<\/p>\n<p>punched in the gut<\/p>\n<p>targeted<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>ISOLATION (total 12)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>alone<\/p>\n<p>disconnected<\/p>\n<p>disregarded<\/p>\n<p>distance<\/p>\n<p>excluded<\/p>\n<p>exclusion<\/p>\n<p>mistrust<\/p>\n<p>misunderstood (2)<\/p>\n<p>ostracized<\/p>\n<p>rejected (2)<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>ANGER (total 22)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>angered<\/p>\n<p>angry (7)<\/p>\n<p>disappointed (6)<\/p>\n<p>frustrated (5)<\/p>\n<p>outraged<\/p>\n<p>pissed off (2)<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>FEAR (total 4)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>apprehensive<\/p>\n<p>scared (2)<\/p>\n<p>worried<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>UNCERTAINTY (total 17)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>at a crossroads<\/p>\n<p>confused (13)<\/p>\n<p>don\u2019t understand<\/p>\n<p>why<\/p>\n<p>wonder<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>SADNESS (total 26)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>depression<\/p>\n<p>discouraged (2)<\/p>\n<p>dismay\/ed (5)<\/p>\n<p>grief<\/p>\n<p>heartbroken<\/p>\n<p>hopeless (3)<\/p>\n<p>mourning (2)<\/p>\n<p>sad\/ness (10)<\/p>\n<p>sorrow<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>SHOCK (total 14)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>disbelief (2)<\/p>\n<p>shock\/ed (8)<\/p>\n<p>surprised (2)<\/p>\n<p>unsettled (2)<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>FAITH LOSS\/CRISIS (total 9)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>disillusioned<\/p>\n<p>embarrassed<\/p>\n<p>in complete contrast to love felt in her ward<\/p>\n<p>mistake (but correctable)<\/p>\n<p>policy dismantled<\/p>\n<p>resigned (from the Church)<\/p>\n<p>sorry I\u2019m out<\/p>\n<p>that\u2019s not my God<\/p>\n<p>uninspired<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>WITHDRAWAL (total 4)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>kind of said whatever<\/p>\n<p>meh<\/p>\n<p>resignation<\/p>\n<p>taking a step back<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>HOPE (total 25)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>appreciative (because it\u2019s a catalyst for conversations that we need to have)<\/p>\n<p>authenticity<\/p>\n<p>cautiously optimistic<\/p>\n<p>confident (2)<\/p>\n<p>excited<\/p>\n<p>hope\/ful (15)<\/p>\n<p>optimistic<\/p>\n<p>positive outlook<\/p>\n<p>resolute<\/p>\n<p>resolved<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>FAITH (total 13)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>assured<\/p>\n<p>consistency<\/p>\n<p>faithful (2)<\/p>\n<p>have a testimony of the church and the prophet<\/p>\n<p>patience<\/p>\n<p>peace\/ful (2)<\/p>\n<p>testimony<\/p>\n<p>trust in God<\/p>\n<p>try to keep faith<\/p>\n<p>waiting (2)<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>CONNECTION (total 5)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>compassion<\/p>\n<p>love (2)<\/p>\n<p>loved<\/p>\n<p>service<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>OPENNESS (total 11)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>here to listen<\/p>\n<p>learn<\/p>\n<p>listen\/ing (2)<\/p>\n<p>need to learn<\/p>\n<p>open<\/p>\n<p>questioning<\/p>\n<p>searching (2)<\/p>\n<p>understanding (2)<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><u>ENCOURAGED BY AFFIRMATION COMMUNITY (total 4)<\/u><\/p>\n<p>feel a love here<\/p>\n<p>grateful to be here<\/p>\n<p>happy to be here<\/p>\n<p>really felt the spirit this morning<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Anyone questioning the LGBT community, or anyone &#8220;struggling&#8221; with a loved one who is LGBT, simply needs to attend one of Affirmation&#8217;s conferences. It will change their perspective, heart and likely life forever&#8230;. And for [our son]? A miracle indeed. He went from a place of confusion and torment to a place of peace, understanding and pure Christ-like love.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":15643,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_piecal_is_recurring":false,"_piecal_recurring_interval":1,"_piecal_recurring_frequency":"","_piecal_recurring_exact_position":false,"_piecal_recurring_end":"","_piecal_color":"","_piecal_text_color":"","_piecal_global_color_master":false,"_piecal_rsets":"[]","_piecal_is_event":false,"_piecal_start_date":"","_piecal_end_date":"","_piecal_is_allday":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1849],"tags":[1063],"newsletters":[],"class_list":["post-8673","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","tag-november-2015-policy"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>LGBT Mormons and Families Talk about the New LDS Policy<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/affirmation.org\/pt\/lgbt-mormons-and-family-talk-about-the-new-lds-policy\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"pt_BR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"LGBT Mormons and Families Talk about the New LDS Policy\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Anyone questioning the LGBT community, or anyone &quot;struggling&quot; with a loved one who is LGBT, simply needs to attend one of Affirmation&#039;s conferences. 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