Finding a Loving Home in Affirmation
Finding Affirmation was like opening a door to a world of possibilities, like stepping out of a dark place filled with doubts, fear, and uncertainty into the light. I was walking in that darkness, wounded and angry. I joined The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in 2001. There, I had been taught a gospel that included a loving, compassionate Heavenly Father and eternal families. But I was judged severely for wanting to be loved, understood, and cared for.
When I went to my bishop, his response was that I would be excommunicated and that there would be a disciplinary council. I asked myself, “Why? Where is my eternal family?” I never found the answers to those questions. My sorrow grew, along with my hatred and resentment. I became a wreck. I was one more woman wandering through the world without hope or the desire to live. I was at my lowest. I tried fasting and praying. I still trusted my Heavenly Father’s mercy and grace to guide me.
Eventually, I overcame my pride and seek help. I go to therapy with psychologists. I attended a self-help workshop. I still felt like I had no place. One day, while surfing the web, I saw Affirmation: LGBTQ Mormons. It caught my attention. I was curious. I asked myself, “What is LGBTQ?” I continued to investigate. I dared to send a message. I received a response. A call. An appointment. Then I made plans to travel to Mexico City, my hometown, to attend my first Affirmation conference. This was August 2017. There, I found a home. A family. Loving friends. I was welcomed with love and compassion. There, with them, I could be authentic and free.
This article was submitted by an Affirmation community member. The opinions expressed are wholly those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Affirmation, our leadership, or our staff. Affirmation welcomes the submission of articles by community members in accordance with our mission, which includes promoting the understanding, acceptance, and self-determination of individuals of diverse sexual orientations, gender identities and expressions, and our vision for Affirmation to be a refuge to land, heal, share, and be authentic.